I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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