I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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