So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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