So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I said "one day" and that day is not today
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
