dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I am mentally ready for anal.
ok first of all what the fuck
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
