Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
and she was petting her beer can
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Oh god it's open bar.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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