Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
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