She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
