That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
