Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
