His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
