I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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