Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
