you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
