I'm drive I can fine osifer
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
