Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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