Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
