I'm jealous of your bromance
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
