the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
We were destined to go to rehab together
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
