READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
