i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
