i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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