Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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