So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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