dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
