even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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