just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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