Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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