i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I think I am morally bankrupt
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
