awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
