oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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