found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
