It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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