His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize