she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
