So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
