In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
