Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
