Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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