I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize