In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize