Swine flu. Run for my life!
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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