Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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