only if we run a train.
done.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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