alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
