Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
