i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize