Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
