Can Purell be used as lube?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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