girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
