My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
